Monday 27 October 2008

High School Musical 3 Review

High School Musical is for gays and spastics. Woh there. Hold your horses. I've obviously just written that line to get a reaction out of people and to make me sound like 'I jus don't giv a fuck yeh!'. Well, yes, part of me wrote it for that reason but the other part of me wrote it because I have something genuine to say about High School Musical. And that point is that its brilliant for people with special needs (not the silly word I first used) and some (not all) overly effeminite men, i.e gays (at the time of going to press that word was still okay to use, also because I'm very scared of backlashes I'd like to point out I'm not linking the two groups in anyway). It's works for some because it has bright colours, cheerful messages, an easy to follow plot and lots and lots of singing and dancing.

What annoys me, to the point of almost suffering a rage induced stroke coming out of my viewing, is that it will be, by far, one of the most popular films of the year. It will certainly be the most profitable, thus causing every single studio to look for a way to cash-in on the 'HSM factor'. And this cashcow is not down to any niche market, its not down to the fact that a minority of people will go see this. Its because everyone will. And when everyone does, the studios will make more films with no regard for plot, no genuine emotion and no point to make. And this, this is the cause of my anger.

Parents will be dragged by their kids to such a greater extent than when a real piece of cinema like Wall-E dares to jockey for position on the silver screen/40 foot advertising board. It sucks but its an accepted fact. Kids are pretty stupid. Pre-teens will go because they fancy one of the leads. Not the worst reason to go to the cinemas. Some guys and gals love Zach Efrons Gallagher eyebrows. Hey each to their own. And again, this is all tolerable. But, but, but so, so, so many people will go to see it 'ironically'.

These 'adults' that say they like movies yet wouldn't venture out their front doors to watch great cinema like There Will Be Blood or the aformentioned Wall-E. These 'ironic' people that think 'its so shit its great', that go to watch it 3 or 4 times, each time more money in the hands of the producers that just can't believe how lucky they are to have sold shit with sprinkles on it for £6.50 a plop. I realise this isn't actually a review, in fact its the first time this year where I've broken into a full on, "say nothing about the film" ranty rant and most people will say to me lighten up its just a bit of fun. But please, vote with your feet and your money, don't let the producers win. If you are a grown-up, intelligent person, please don't watch High School Musical.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Ah the classic 'irony' defence. You know, I have long suspected this justification is nothing more than a big facade and that people who like stuff 'ironically' actually genuinely like it but are afraid to admit it to their peers. Let's face it there are much easier and cheaper ways to combine 'High School Musical' with irony than going to see it at the cinema. And you're right, this film will be seen by more people than dozens of far worthier films and it does become a cycle. Producers know this - particularly a company like Disney whose entire ethos is capitalist and entirely manipulative. These are films put together by marketing, not artists. The real problem is that people - and I'm not picking on any particulars - are stupid. Many, many individuals are not but once you take the public en masse, they will always go for the soft option. As an artist it frustrates the hell out of me because I think 'surely people are looking for something new and stimulating' something which will enrich them? Unfortunately we now live in a society where we are kept dumb by a carefully controlled media and anything new has its worth guaged by how similar it is to what has gone before. People don't want art or worth or anything that may provoke thought because that would require forming your own opinion instead of having it formed for you. Now of course not everyone is like this but I'm saying as a group society is. And cinema in particular can be very peer-led. For example many folks go to see a film as a group which can inevitably lead to compromise, that compromise often being the weakest film showing. Also it is very easy for a person who is interested in a film to have a few friends say 'oh I heard that's shit' and be put off. I could go on. Instead though I leave you to think about this: where did this whole 'irony' thing come from? I'm sure pre-90s (at the earliest) no-one would ever do rubbish things 'ironically.' So what did they do? Be honest or lie about it? Now you can do 'both'